First time coffee jitters

Wowzers I'm blogging at 8.09 in the morning! That's dedication.

Last night I drank some decaff coffee. I don't usually drink coffee, I haven't for about a year. I don't drink caffeine you see, I don't like the way it makes me feel. I always get those hot flushes after drinking it, and then I get really tired. But I thought that decaff would be ok, and I really felt like it, I like the smell and the taste of coffee, so I thought it would be ok, but alas I was FOOLED. I think it had to do that I was already quite stressed out and wound up, and somehow it only made it worse. My body felt all restless and I was all agitated. So never again, not even decaff.


Sorry I haven't updated. On Monday I gatecrashed Mum and Andy's trip away in the caravan. They were going to Norfolk in the caravan for a few days, so I asked if I could come along for the day, because I didn't really want to spend the day by myself. We went to Kings Lynn, and then to Hunstanton, where we walked along the windy sea front and ate ice-creams, then we played on the 2p machines, then I had a battered sausage. It was good.

After this they were going to the caravan site and I was just going to go home, but Andy suggested that perhaps I should come and spend some time there in the evening then drive home later to avoid the bank holiday traffic. So I did, then I ended up staying because it got late. We ate fish and chips from a van at the campsite. The next day we walked to Sandringham house to visit the Queen. But like the selfish person she is, she wasn't even there! It was such a nice day, and we walked around the gardens and lake and looked in the house.

I love going to look round houses. But I always get annoyed because you can't look around the whole house. I just have curiosity about the house's architecture and layout, and want to go through all the doors and passageways and spend a whole day exploring every room. It's too tempting when you can see doors and corridors leading places you can't go.

Once when I was taking photographs at St.Fagens in Wales and Rob was helping me ( hah I keep on typing Rob's name as Ron, and it makes me laugh that his name could be Ron, and imagining him as a Ron...) and we went to look around the big house that they have there. In one bedroom upstairs you can go in the entrance but then there is a rope, but on the other side of the room there is another little room that you can just see into. I think this is unfair that they would have this room on display, but only just, just teasing you. So we looked around for cameras and when seeing none, I stepped across the rope to go and look into the other room. I made it about 3 or 4 steps into the middle of the room, when I heard a click, then the alarms started going off! Me and Rob panicked, then walked rather quickly out of the room, careful not to look back at all the school children and teachers in the hall outside. We rushed out of the house, not daring to look back. It's probably one of the naughtiest things I've ever done.


SO, anyway, I left in the late afternoon to go and pick Rob up from the train station. He is up visiting for a few days, because today, yes TODAY we have our 20 week scan. That means that we get to see our baby again today, and hopefully find out the sex! I'm very excited, but also nervous. This scan is where they look closely at all the babies insides to check that everything has developed well and there are no problems. So fingers crossed that everything is ok!


Yesterday I had a lovely day with dearest Robert. We went swimming at lunchtime, then drove to Lincoln to go to the cinema. We watched Scott Pilgram Vs the world. It was funny. Then we ate nachos at Wetherspoons. Then we returned home to see Mother and Andy. Last night I had a bit of an argument with my dad. About graduation. It's complicated and I won't go into it on here. But I felt stressed out and horrid about it all night. I really do hope it gets sorted out, and that my dad will come to graduation, as it means a lot to me for both my parents to be there, just as my parents. I wish everything could be normal and simple, like it is for most other people, but it seems that will never be the case with my family. It is just one day, and I just want it to go smoothly with no stress or worry or awkward feeling. Just for one day.


I've felt a lot more frequent movements in my stomach, like little bubbles and turns. Its strange when it happens, because I remember that there is something else inside me. An actual living being, with its own movements. And I'm walking around with it inside me. When its born I'm going to look at it and think, you used to live inside me. (I can't wait to know the sex so I can stop calling it, it) Also yesterday I thought about when its older, and how interesting and fun it will be hanging out with a child all the time. Children's minds and imaginations are amazing, and I can't wait to have conversations and hear stories, and just generally be around a child.


Right I'm going to leave it there. I need some breakfast and a cuddle.

Au Revoir...

(til later today I imagine, where I can share with you the news, hopefully, if you are lucky)

p.s I'm 20 weeks today. 20 out of 40, half way, only 20 weeks left til it's not just me anymore, and there is a baby in my life, and a child, for ever. 20 weeks. eeeek.


  1. And the time is ticking... We're dying here at work to celebrate the sex!


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